12.28.2011

beautiful, delightful.

Oh, it's almost 2012. Time runs so fast and many things have collided and crashed to the moon this year. In January to April, i went through a cold dark phase with my lyubovnik and finally in a hazy Monday, we exploded into thousands of blitzkrieg pieces. I went through a damp phase after it. You know... that phase when you feel like bumping into things and you can't stop dropping everything. He had been my golden best friend. He wasn't just a lover or a boyfriend, he was more than that. I had never been so close to a person before (i don't talk too much with my parents and they're too busy with their own circle of jobs, so you know.). It was like a finally happened noon-mare. I thought we would be cool together, but I was wrong. So, he and I decided to jump to the ocean, but in different direction. I had no map and I swam in the damp ocean myself, floating softly like a sponge, in vain. 

One day, I heard a news from a raven, he said my lyubovnik had already found a new ark. All of the sudden, something bhang my head and I was in mute for some minutes. I didn't run to tears. I was like numb. Then, i just floated away to another ocean. I didn't find any ark, but i found some boats that I could sleep for awhile and didn't get wet and salty. I also found some new friends, like the raven, the sea horse, the lilac mermaid, the fluffy polar bear who never settled his mind in a correct place, and also the seagull. I found myself sinking, floating and flying above the ocean with them. In one sunny Saturday, I received a mail from the cliffman. It was wrapped in a blue envelope with a golden stamp on the right edge of it. It said, "we have to meet under the forest's willow tree at 10 a.m next Wednesday." . I asked the cliffman, "Hey, who's the sender?". But I heard no answer, no voice, only the humming wind. I gazed around at the black sand shore and there he was, looking small in the middle of the yellow summer haze and sailing on his wooden boat to the minty forest across. And i stood still with my toes buried under the shimmering black sand.

 I finally brought myself to the only willow tree at the minty forest. It was a chillwave-y day, filled with the sun flares that tasted like lemon liquor. There was nobody there, the willow still aslept and the mayflies flew around its branches in a delightful breeze. Then, i heard somebody practicing my name. I though i knew that voice. I turned around and stared at the brown eyes over my shoulder. And as you can tell, yes.. it was him. He sank me in a tender hug and I was drowned between his arms, that felt like esoteric aquamarine ocean. We didn't say anything and sank ourselves into our own silent ocean in an hour or so. I could hear the seagull whistled from another unknown island of palm trees and the sun leaks touched our melting skin like an eternal kiss from the Goddess. It was beautiful. It was delightful. I know that until now, that we are beautiful, we are delightful. And I know one day, we will still be beautiful, we will still be delightful.


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